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Florida Mystery Solved: The Truth Behind Car Crunching Cryptid

Author Budman
Okay friends, we have a real Florida mystery on our hands! For over a year now, a couple from here in Lee County,the Dreschers, have been grappling with a conundrum that has left them scratching their heads. Oh, and scratches on their cars.
This Florida mystery was happening in a quiet Lehigh Acres neighborhood. Where, according to NBC2, Regina Drescher stumbled upon her shiny new Honda looking like it got into a boxing match with a plastic-eating ninja squirrel. Now, I’ve heard of scrapes and dings, but a pecked windshield? That’s some next-level demon bird demolition!
There’s also this rubber-seal-nibbling thing going on too. Regina said that it looked like her car had been attacked by some kind of creature. Then Regina’s partner Scott found paint scratches as if an angry bobcat decided to use the car as a scratching post. And what’s their reaction? The classic “We have no idea” response. Now, that rings of suburban mystery!

The Cryptid Culprits:

But hold on to your hubcaps, because a year later, Scott’s truck was the latest victim of what can only be described as the “Crested Caracara Catastrophe.”
And guess what? It’s not a gang of evil squirrels. It’s just two small birds, Crested Caracaras, making themselves at home on car roofs and treating them like an all-you-can-eat bird buffet.
So why are these birds so obsessed with car trimmings? Regina and Scott, bless their puzzled hearts, are just as confused the rest of us. Now, while Regina’s car is now seeking refuge in the garage, Scott’s truck might soon find a new wingman in the form of a wooden owl. Because nothing says “Don’t mess with my ride” like an owl-shaped vigilante.

 

These Are The 9 Most Dangerous Animals Lurking In The Florida Everglades

I know what you’re thinking.  Why on earth would anyone need to know what dangerous animals are in the Florida Everglades?  Surely, no one is looking to go swimming in a swamp.  Wrong!

People are actually searching “Is it safe to swim in the Florida Everglades?”  I actually laughed when I saw the Google response, ABSOLUTELY NOT!  🤣 Now you see why I thought there might be a need to let people know what creatures might be lurking around them.  That is should they choose to refuse the advice from Google and take a plunge anyway.

We all know about the typical swamp creatures, like alligators and snakes.  We see them every single time we drive across Alligator Alley to the east coast.  This is Florida after all, so those come at no surprise.   But what other types of vicious creatures are underneath all of that brown water and muck?  Or perhaps taking a stroll on the waters edge?

If you’ve been on one of those super fun airboat tours out in the Everglades, some of these animal names might have been mentioned.  Heck!  You may have even seen some of these dangerous critters on your tour.

Let’s take a look at 9 of the most dangerous animals in the Florida Everglades.   Some of these animals are also included on this list, Florida Endangered Species List Is Now Up To 39 Species.

If these don’t scare you, you might be interested in hunting them.  Read here about how much python hunters get paid.

  • American Alligator

    The American alligator can be seen in massive numbers.  You’ll see at least 5-10 sunbathing on any given day, as you drive across Alligator Alley.

    Alligator in Everglades National Park

    American Alligator in Everglades National Park

  • Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnake

    This snake is the one most venomous snakes in the state, and actually in the world.  It is also known as the largest rattlesnake.

    Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnake

    Eastern diamondback rattlesnake from Big Cypress National Preserve (adjacent to Everglades National Park), Florida

  • Florida Panther

    The Florida Panther is a beautiful creature and is on the endangered species list.  As you’ll see below, they stalk.  These creatures are not seen too often.

    Stalking behavior of Florida Panther

    Stalking behavior of Florida Panther in Florida. Lurking in bushes.

  • Brown Recluse Spider

    A brown recluse spider is most common in warmer climates.  It is one of the most poisonous spiders in the Everglades.

    A macro shot of a Brown recluse spider

    A macro shot of a Brown recluse spider

  • American Crocodile

    Yes, crocodile.  American crocodiles are found in Florida.  It’s not an alligator.

    American Crocodile swimming in water in South Florida, near Everglades National Park

    American Crocodile swimming in water in South Florida, near Everglades National Park

  • Florida Black Bear

    We see these furry guys walking around neighborhoods in Estero quite often.  With new construction, they’re forced out of their habitats.  But, they are not safe to approach.  They will defend themselves.

    Florida Black Bear in suburban neighborhood

    Florida Black Bear in suburban neighborhood

  • Florida Cottonmouth

    The cottonmouth can be confused with other water snakes. Take extreme caution.  These snakes are venomous with a mortality rate of 17%.

    Florida Cottonmouth or water moccasin snake, close up

    Florida Cottonmouth or water moccasin snake, close up in the Everglades

  • Burmese Python

    These snakes are commonly seen being hunted.  Reason is, they’re becoming an extremely invasive species across the state.  They are constrictors and are non venomous.

    Burmese python or Python bivittatus snake swims in the water in a marsh in the Florida Everglades.

    Burmese python or Python bivittatus snake swims in the water in a marsh in the Florida Everglades.

  • Alligator Snapping Turtle

    Let’s just say this one looks the scariest to me!  I never thought I would be scared of a turtle.  They are much more aggressive on land than they are in the water.

    Alligator snapping turtle.

    Alligator snapping turtle.

Meet Budman, dynamic host of Marconi Award winning radio station WXKB's WiLD Bunch Morning Show, on B1039. Budman likes to write about funny news, a good Florida man story, stupid criminals or anything involving a superhero. Budman, a comic book and pop culture enthusiast, even named his daughter Kara Zor-El, after Supergirl. His only child is his true passion beyond the mic. Being a dad is his favorite role. Budman, a true family man, balances his love for radio with quality time spent with loved ones and his trusty dogs.

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